"Bible Woman"

There's a term that I kept hearing over and over again my first few months that we were in the Philippines,  'Bible Woman'. 

Everyone kept using the term as if I knew what it was, even my family...but really...I had no clue. Finally I caught on in which I explained it to someone and they confirmed my words! I was correct. We Americans tend to assume that the rest of the world does things as we do and that our way is the 'right way' when in truth it's not that it's the ultimate 'right way' but that it's just the way our culture does it. In the American culture the Pastor's wife assumes the role that is played in the Philippines as the Bible Woman. She does what the church needs her to do. Whether it's counselling, playing music, filling in for the Sunday School teacher that got sick, or leading woman's bible studies, she is 'go to girl'. The difference is that for the Bible Woman she is hired, probably single, and is obligated to do all these things because it's her actual job where as the Pastor's wife is perfectly fine to 'say no' to something and isn't paid but just obligated by her ministry position to serve alongside her husband, he's the one that's paid because he was technically the one that was hired, not the wife...it's just assumed that she'll serve in the church as well. And yes, many pastors will be hired or fired solely because of his wife in America.

I actually had forgotten about this until it hit me the other day while I was reading a book. The book is about the ridiculous expectations of Pastor's wives that can not ever be met, and as I was reading this the Filipino Bible Woman jumped into my head. You may be wondering right now, "then what does the Pastor's wife in the Philippines do?" She works. She has her own job. It's very rare for only one spouse in the home to be working. Why? Because the country is so 'impoverished' they can't afford to not work, it's what the culture expects. It's assumed that the wife will have her own full time job and she won't be nearly as obligated into working in the church as the American Pastor's wife is....that's the Bible Woman's job.

What intrigues me the most about this is the strength and heart it takes for each Bible Woman to assume her hired role. It amazed me the number of young girls and women that had such a profound desire to be a Bible Woman even with knowing the possibility that they will end up at a church with no family, friends, or a husband to be there for her. These girl's eyes gleamed with the anticipation of the ministry and it was the epitome of encouragement.

It used to be, in the States, that if a woman wanted to be in the ministry she had to marry into it. However, in the past decade or so it's gladly been changing. Women have realized that they can serve the Lord in the ministry in so many other ways without having to be married. I know of gals I went to college with that are single full-time missionaries. There are women's ministries, deaf ministries, children's ministries, writing ministries, bible study ministries, teachers, missionaries, and the list goes on! You don't have to preach to a church to be in the ministry these days and oh how refreshing it is to know that there is so much more out there that we can do for the Lord! Yes, I'm married....but it's so encouraging to know that if I weren't that there is plenty I could do in the ministry. 

Are you in some kind of ministry? If so, what is it? What have been your challenges and your life changing moments?

Ant Invasion...

About 4 weeks ago my mother's very clean kitchen was being taken over by ants. No matter what she did or how much vinegar she used (which usually works) they couldn't be kept away. As we were contemplated what to do I remembered something a friend of mine told me about a couple years ago. She mentioned mixing borax into some jam and placing it near the path of the ants and as they eat it and take it back to the others to share they then all pass away. 

So we tried it.

And you know what!?! 

It worked! 

We made sure to do it at a time that was convenient with keeping the dogs outside so as to not harm them if they were to ingest the poisoned jam also....which we had no doubt that they would have. Here's what we did.

Take a small lid or device of some sort and place a glob of jam on it. Then take a decent amount borax and mix it in. It's that simple. Then place it in the ant's pathway and watch the magic happen. It took about 30 minutes for the ants to all find their way to the jam but once they did it was like opening a free candy buffet to a bunch of 4 year-olds. 

We placed this in a corner by the front door since seemed to have been finding their way in through their...(her kitchen is right beside it).

It's been a while now and the invasion seems to have been truly ceased which has resulted in a very happy momma.

Have a good day!!!

What are some of your ant invasion stories?

One Sided French-Braid Bun

About a week ago my oldest sister and her kiddos made a short visit, so we decided to have a hair day. I presented 3 different hair-dos to my almost 10 year old niece in which she picked the one that this post is about....THUS she is the beautiful subject in the pictures.

INSTRUCTIONS for the one sided french-braid bun:

1. Using a wide-tooth comb or pick, comb all the hair to one side.

2. Start french braiding. 

*If you do not know how to french braid, there are plenty of extremely good tutorials you can find on youtube of a simple french braid. Like THIS one.

*With this side braid you will just be adding much more hair on the one side as opposed to the very little amount you will be using on the other side...and don't worry, it will turn out great!

3. Braid all the way down the hair.

4. Take the braid and roll it (like you roll up a sleeping bag. DON'T TWIST!!!) starting from the bottom to where it tightly snuggles against the nape of the neck and hold it in place with one hand.

5. Then pin it in place piece by piece on the outer edges.

6. Enjoy the happy smile on the finished product.

Split-Pea Soup

I had never even heard of split-pea soup, or even split-peas for that matter, until we were out of the country (by the way....we are back in the states now. Yay!). It's not that the natives ate a lot of split-peas, because they didn't, but I personally got into them when I was having some digestive issues. I started eating them once a day for either breakfast or supper. Finally one day my father-in-law heard me talking about split-peas and immediately, memories of him as a boy (in the states) eating his mother's split-pea soup popped into his head. He had no idea how to make it but asked me to try and make some for him. So I did some pinteresting and concocted my own recipe based on what I liked and what I had available. It turned out amazing. Yes, it looks gross -like a baby's blow-out after eating two jars of green beans- but it tastes amazing. 

So the other day I decided to make some for myself and have my mother try it (since she had never had it before) and she was pleased. AND since I had access to other devises and ingredients I 'went to town'. 

By the way:

Split-peas are extremely good for you. In just 1/4 cup of them is AT LEAST 9-10 grams of fiber. They are low in calories, high in protein and vitamins and minerals. Just click on that link and you'll be able to read all about their amazing goodness: Benefits of Split-Peas. 

INGREDIENTS:
*1 bag of dried split-peas
*6-8 cups of water (based upon how thick you want it) -I use 8.
*2 chicken bullion cubes/1 tb of chicken bullion
*LOTS of garlic (minced or powdered)
*seasonings of choice -I used parsley, pepper, sea salt and basically everything in my mother's seasoning cabinet except rosemary. And she didn't have any thyme. -LOL pun not intended.
OPTIONAL INGREDIENTS:
*bacon bits/shredded chicken/or ham + ham hock. -I used low sodium bacon bits.
*1/8cup -1/4cup shredded carrot
*chopped onions -I did not even remotely use onions....but the carrots were great.

INSTRUCTIONS FOR CROCK-POT COOKING:
*Dump the entire bag of dried peas into the pot.
*Add water and bullion.
*Add carrots.
*Add all other seasonings and meat and other desired ingredients.
*Cook on low for about 8 full hours stirring occasionally OR on high for 4-5 hours
....over cooking will not ruin the soup in any way.

INSTRUCTIONS FOR STOVE-TOP COOKING:
*Add ingredients according to the above instructions and boil/simmer in large pot for 1-2 hours (depending on type of stove). Stir occasionally.

HELPFUL HINT:
*It is unnecessary to smash the peas. If they are cooked long enough then they will naturally become 'mushy'.  -If there is any crunch to your peas then they have not cooked long enough.
*If you prefer to play it safe with your meat, then boiling it before you put it into the soup will not hurt anything.
*It tastes the best the second day after it's been put into the fridge and reheated.

Keeping Cool: 10 Easy Ways to Keep Cool While Keeping The Costs Down...

It is the end of March which means that many places are getting into their warm weather...that is if this hard winter will finally go into hibernation mode...so I have here some tips for you and others to keep safe and cool while still keeping your utility bills relatively low.

1. Only turn your air conditioner on for one hour at the hottest point of the day (early afternoon).

2. Keep your blinds and curtains completely shut all day (to block the 'greenhouse effect'), BUT leave your windows open to allow some air flow (except during your one hour of a.c.).
        *Don't leave your lights on but only use lights during necessary use.

3. Only drink refrigerated or ice water.
       *No soda as that actually DE-hydrates you.
       *Drink 8 glasses of water a day. Some more/some less depending on body size, age, and amount of fruits and veggies you eat throughout the day.
       *Some people are worried about the effect that sometimes can happen when drinking cold water when the body is too hot. -You should be fine as long as you don't guzzle it right after coming back into the house all hot and sweaty.

4. Invest in a heavy-duty ceiling or box fan. -With the use of those you may never need your one hour of a.c.
      *Using an attic fan or box fan at night does wonders with keeping the place cool for sleeping.

5. Do not use your oven except for special occasions.
      *Eat 'cold' meals: sandwiches, salads, etc.
      *OR just use one of those George Foremans for cooking certain things.

6. Eat A LOT of cold/refrigerated fruit and veggies. I know many folks that enjoy frozen fruit as well such as grapes and other berries.

7. Take 2 cold showers/baths a day. 1 to wash and 1 to rinse/cool off.
       *To conserve on water, turn it off during soaping/shampooing/shaving and turn it back on to rinse.

8. Do not use hair dryers, clothing dryers, hair irons, or clothing irons, or any other heat inflecting appliances except during mandatory times.
       *For your hair, braid it after washing and let it out after it's dry to give it a nice wave.
          -That will also give you a nice summer style.
       *Hang your clothes out to dry either around the house or outside.
       *Mist spray your clothes with water and shake them out to get out wrinkles.
       *Also leave these unplugged when they aren't being used.

     
9. Run through the sprinklers outside with your kids.
       *That not only cools you off but it also is just a lot of fun.

10. Wear light clothing. Not skimpy, but light. -There is a difference.

Please check-in on your elderly neighbors. Every year the summer time brings unfortunate deaths among the elderly from heat stroke. Often times it's the ones that didn't have anyone to check in on them and/or were so low on expenses that they couldn't use their air conditioner and didn't take precautions for it. So please check on them and make sure that they are keeping cool during those hot days as well.

I had typed in "elderly person keeping cool" and this picture had been among them. It was so cute I couldn't pass it up so I had to share it with you!

What are some inexpensive things you've found that helps keep you cool during the hot summer months?

     

Celebrating 4 Years of Marriage:One of Our Biggest Lessons.

It is so weird that it is now the month of march and just 4 years ago I said "I do" to the man I dedicated my heart to... 

One of the biggest lessons that Hubby and I have learned since getting married is this:

While for years before I even met Hubby, while we were engaged, at our wedding, and after, the phrase I constantly heard over and over again and that I actually believed to be true was the phrase "Don't go to bed angry at each other." AKA...solve your fights before going to bed. We tried that. We really, Really, REALLY tried that. And you know what? It didn't work for us. Instead it made things worse. At night when we are sleepy we get grumpy and emotionally and mentally exhausted which then made our fights even worse because our grumpiness and emotions are high and we aren't thinking clearly because of sleep deprivation. That doesn't help when you are trying to be calm and rational thus we would just keep getting angrier. Finally we tried something new, something Hubby had been wanting to do for awhile..."Let's sleep on it." 

We decided to stop our fight once it got to a certain point and instead go to sleep. Yes, I (being the crazy emotional one) would still be awake for another hour sulking while he was vast asleep...but we did stop fighting and I eventually did go to sleep. The next day, since we slept on it, we were thinking much clearer about the situation at hand. Then by the afternoon and getting out of work we realized we were able to talk about the subject again, so to keep ourselves in check we went out in public to talk. It didn't matter where, as long as we went somewhere public to sit down with a pencil and paper at hand to discuss our issue in a very rational and calm way so that we would be able to talk through it. And you know what? It worked like a charm! Since we weren't sleepy we were thinking clearly. Since we were in public we stayed calm and rational. And since we had a pencil and paper in our hands to list out and discuss our issue completely through we were successful. Then we would pray together and go home happy, apologetic, and in understanding of one another -something we couldn't do when sleepy. 

So, ever since that first time, I quit repeating the phrase "Don't go to bed angry" and we continued to just 'sleep on it' and give it time and then go out and discuss it. Since then I will say or write to people, "Figure out what works for you and as long as it is morally right, do it. Don't worry about what others think of you, just do what works for the two you." Why is this much better? Because everyone is different and so while for probably most couples it is a great rule to follow 'to not go to bed angry at one another', it may not work for everyone, like us. So our biggest lesson ever was figuring out what worked for us instead of doing what everyone else says to do.

P.S. Yes, ever so often we have been so upset that it took two whole days before we would come together and discuss it, but eventually we always do and it always ends the same happy and resolute way. By the way, we would never send the other out to the couch to sleep, we still slept in the same bed no matter how upset we were. We would still talk about other things as well, just not the subject that got us fighting until it was time to discuss it in the way I described above.

What are some things that you and your spouse found that works well for you? 

Please keep your comments bellow morally clean and appropriate considering this tender subject.

Cardigan Make-Over.

I had this white cardigan that I got a couple years ago that just wasn't 'making the cut'. When it arrived in the mail and I pulled it out of it's box the first thing I thought was how much longer it looked than in the pic online (probably because models have to be AT LEAST 5' 7" while I am not even 5' 2"). So while yes I loved that it was white and had quarter sleeves the cardigan always looked kind of shabby on me. But finally after sifting through Pinterest the other day I saw a pin that gave me an idea. The pin itself was something that I would never wear, but it was an idea that I could use for something else that would look a lot more tasteful. So I went to work on my shabby cardigan and I am very happy with the results.

I can wear this casually over another tshirt or tank-top. OR I can even wear it over something with a collar such as my black sleeveless collared dress I have. Here is what I did.

1. Turned my cardigan over and cut half of the back off.

2. Put it on and played around with how I wanted it to lay when cris-crossed.

    *I didn't want it to be immodest and so I kept playing with it to find the right fit.

    *Clip that in place.

3. I then took it off and pinned the edges together.

4. Then I cut off the remaining fabric as you see above.

5. Sewed the pinned corners together.

6. Put it on, tucked the back up a little bit, and smiled.

What are some things you've found to change your cardigans into?

Making Friends in a New Place.

I have moved A LOT in my life, not just since I've been married but ever since I was born I've moved a lot. Moving to a new place can be extremely difficult on your emotional and mental well-being because we get overwhelmed and depressed. So here are some things that I have learned that helped me that maybe will help you too...

1. Join some sort of social circle. 

For me it was church and our seminary wives fellowship, those were a given. But some women may want their circle to be a book club, a cooking class, or even a support group for moms.

2. Pick a handful of random women around your age and invite them over. 

To keep the awkwardness at a minimum invite them over for something specific such as a baking night, a craft night, I personally had a tendency to do a scrapbooking night. Which worked out well because there were women that came that didn't even scrapbook but they would bring some sort of other project they were working on and work on that instead. Doing this helped take the edge off and 'break the ice'. It also gave us something to concentrate on and do with our hands as we had the silent moments of conversation.

3. Go walking.

This gives you the opportunity to meet your neighbors. Even if you are shy and not the one to walk up to random strangers, people will either come to you or at least wave to you. Over time you will learn each other's names and maybe even make friends with one or two of them.

4. If talking scares you, pick one young woman that seems kind and talkative and invite her over.

Introverts have an extremely hard time with the idea of walking up to people and starting up a conversation, so while they may not be talkers they definitely are good listeners. So if you are that person, then pick a talker and let them lead the conversation.

5. Go out in public.

Even if you don't intend to talk to anyone. Even if you pick a coffee shop every day and just sit in the same spot and read a book, you are out and around people which will take the emotional depression off your shoulders a little bit. What's even better is if you walk to this place which gets your physical happy chemicals flowing, get's you a little sunshine (vitamin D which is a happy vitamin) and it also gives you a little more exercise for the day.

6. Be open and inviting.

It's easy to keep people held at a distance when you know you will probably not be with them for the rest of your life or when you've had to let go of people too often. But that does nothing but harm to yourself. And the thing is, people notice it. People do notice when you are a person that puts up a wall and it turns people off. Because there are not very many better feelings than when someone is genuinely friendly and welcoming. So take down your wall and take the risk. Yes, you probably will have to say goodbye again, yes you may lose that friend after some time passes (the ones that continually stay in touch are the best of friends), BUT it's worth the risk. In the long run it's healthier not only for you physically and psychologically, but it's healthier for your marriage as well. You need to trust that God will take care of you and just as much as he wants a relationship with you he also wants you to have relationships with other people as well.

7. Get a job.

Whether it's volunteer work or a regular part-time or full-time job, it's so useful to be a part of these because you are actually being forced into some sort of a relationship. Often times you are given many hours with the same people, there are some amazing friendships that happen just in the workplace. This in and of itself, is a great tool for breaking the social barrier from loneliness.

*Note: You do not have to do all of these things, these are just ideas to pick from and help you out. Just pick one of them. If that one doesn't work then try another. Just keep trying, eventually you will find what works for you.

Do you have any questions or ideas about making friends after moving to a new place? 

Just jot them down below in the comment section and I'll do my best to write back. 

What Women Want

This is an age old question that men joke about and women wish was easy to explain, there was even a movie about this very topic. But here is my answer, and it represents women around the entire world. Women want love, beauty, safety, and hope.

Love.

We women will go great lengths in life to find and/or hold onto love. Whether it's from a man, a family member, or a friend...we want it. Without love in our lives we become bitter, cynical, and hatefully desperate. We see the woman stay with the abusive man and answer that the reason why is because "she loves him." and in that one little line she is silently screaming out that she hopes he loves her too. We see women drop everything they are doing and drive miles and miles to go be with their friend that is in pain and suffering. That is love. A common phrase we are hearing in the married world lately is this, "Women need love, men need respect." And we find that when we women aren't feeling loved from our husbands, we become bitter and resentful over it...thus not producing any respect. When we women feel as though our friend we loved so dearly has betrayed us, what do we do? Well let's just say it's rare to find a woman that will forgive her friend right away without any hesitation. That actually has to do with loyalty which in a woman's mind translates to this, "If you loved/cared for me, then you would be loyal. If you break that loyalty and trust then you obviously don't love me." And THAT is why it irks us so much when someone breaks our loyalty. Why? Because we want love. We need love. We feel so utterly hopeless without it. BUT, there is one that we can ALWAYS count on loving us and that's Christ. No matter how little of people you may have in your life, Christ will give you all the love you need.

Beauty.

There are many stories and pictures we see of what women go through in all sorts of places in the name of beauty. They will go into debt and spend thousands of dollars to be cut open and have their looks altered. They will tan their skin, bleach their skin, put cream after cream on, watch hair and makeup tutorials, and in some tribal cultures we even see women lengthen their necks. And why do we do these things? For beauty. When a woman doesn't feel remotely beautiful she loses.....hope. Even when a woman has never seen herself in a mirror, she will still do things in the name of beauty. Why? I have no idea, but we do. So men and women, please tell your wives, friends, sisters, mothers, and daughters that they are gorgeous and then tell them exactly what you think is so gorgeous about them. Don't just tell them once (this goes especially for you men) and then think that they will always remember that, no, you need to tell them on a regular basis.

Safety.

I recently read a "Dear Abby" letter and reply on one of the popular news sites. The letter was about a mother and daughter and how the middle aged mother would start an argument with her adult daughter and then decide she doesn't like what her daughter's opinion is and stop the car in a very dangerous area, make her daughter get out, and drive off. Apparently, she had done that more than once. I am a little different than the majority of folks I guess because I felt the daughter needed to forgive her mother and figure out a way to dodge the arguments and take control of the situation. Instead, I read hundreds of comments of women bashing the mother and saying that the daughter should cut ties with her for putting her life in danger like that. I thought that was a bit extreme but it got me thinking, we women truly do make our decisions based upon whether or not we feel our own self, or our loved ones, are safe. We will break off a relationship with a guy that we feel wouldn't protect us, we would cut ties with a friend that put us in harm's way, we won't live in a scary part of town if we had the means to live somewhere else, we will even keep some sort of weapon near us all in the name of 'feeling safe'. So men, show your gal that you will protect her. Prove to her that she is safe with you and that you would do whatever possible to keep it that way...you will win thousands of brownie points for it.

Hope.

This, in my opinion, is the most important of all. In my mind, when a women loses hope in something she gives up. Some even give up their life over it. Hope is an enormously important and necessary thing to life. It's why we trust, why we love, why we get up each morning and pick out our outfit and go to work or make breakfast for the kids, it's hope. We hope that this day brings us something better, we hope 'this person' loves us, we hope we'll have a long and happy life with the man we say "I do" to, we hope. It's the real reason why the abused woman keeps returning to her jerk of a husband, hope. She hopes he loves her. She hopes he'll change. She hopes she can stop it from happening again. Hope. It's the reason we get up in the morning and go to bed at night, hope. Without hope all reason is gone. And you know what gives us hope? God. God is love and God is hope. He gave us his son because of hope and love. Oh how powerful those two things really are. 

So the next time you hear this conversation, "What do women want?" "I don't know and I don't think they even know." Tell them that all we want is love, hope, beauty, and safety. 

Here is a little funny I found for your day:

Messy Braided Gibson-Tuck

The Gibson-Tuck is not the name I would have chosen for the up-do in the back, however it is it's name thus I shall not change it. It's a popular up-do a girl can find all over Pinterest, however I've never done this for my blog readers nor with the french braid, so I thought it would be a fun style to show.
I recently had my hair layered, and unfortunately that presented a challenge with certain up-dos. After I was almost ready to pull my hair out this morning the idea popped in my head of braiding it on top first, which would solve my dilemma of the shorter layers around my face from falling out. Sure enough, it solved my problem.

Instructions:
1. Using your bristle brush, brush your hair towards the side.
2. Start french braiding from one of the corners of your scalp (above eyebrow). How to french braid bangs
    *Don't make it tight, but instead keep it slightly loose.
    *Some of these braids need to be very clean and precise, this one doesn't. So try not to let a "part" show.

3. Behind your ear, pin your braid securely with an 'X' style and then place some sort of decorative devise over it.
4. Using a hair-tie, tie the top 3/4ths of your hair at the top of your neck.
5. Do a 'pull-through'. How to do a 'pull-through'
6. Now grab ALL of your hair and bring it up and tuck it in pinning it snugly in place.

7. You may take whatever other hair decorative devices and pin them in wherever you like and walk away with a big smile ready to take on the day.

To read some of my other hair posts click on any of these below:
Natural Dry-Shampoo
Unheated Curls
1 Year After 'No-Poo'
Double Twist
French Twist

How to Part With an 'Overwhelming' Wardrobe...

-Love that part in the movie. Chick-Flicks

For people such as myself that find it very difficult to part with an article of clothing, it can be challenging to finally give in and do so. Since I have been the same size since I was 15 (I count moving from a 5 juniors to a 2 in ladies as the same size) my clothes kept piling up more and more throughout the years. Finally I had enough sense knocked into my thick skull to part somewhat with my overwhelming wardrobe and for some time I would at least once a year scavenge through my closet and make a large pile to give away to the local Blind Thrift Store. 

But then a huge moment in my life came, a turning point really. In the spring of 2013, Hubby and I were finished with his seminary classes and it was time to get rid of as much of our stuff as possible so we could fit whatever else into our little Geo Tracker and move back to our home state before coming overseas. I went through my clothes over and over and over again. I had only 2 extra large totes to fill with my clothes plus my last minute suitcase. I went from a wardrobe of over 5 extra large totes to only 2 in a month's time. Week by week I dwindled it down more and more until finally it reached our limit. 

So, how in the world did I do it? What are the suggested guidelines useful for such a job?....

Give Away Pile:
1. If I only wore it once or twice a year.
2. If it was too out-dated to work with for a few more years to come.
3. If it was too young for my age group.
4. If it didn't fit right or suit my body type.
5. If I always hung onto it for a "just in-case" time that I could use in the future, but never actually wore it.
6. If I had too many items in that color or style. (I had over 50 skirts all only 2 different styles).
7. If I did not start to cringe and sweat when the thought of giving it away came to mind.
8. If it was too ugly, worn, or just plain ridiculous.
9. If it was itchy or just had a weird fabric feeling to it.
10. If it had absolutely no practicality whatsoever.
11. If it needed any mending or sewing of any kind to suit style or modesty necessities. -That's a rule only for emergency situations like the one I was in.

Keep:
1. It was easy to wear with lots of different outfits.
2. It fit well.
3. Was in great condition.
4. I loved it beyond reason.
5. Was versatile, practical, and cute.
6. My husband LOVED it.
7. Was very stylish and would be for years to come.
8. Easy to care for.
9. Was a color or style that was needed among my wardrobe.
10. If it made me look better. (Suited my body type/shape).

Throw Into the Trash:
1. If it had holes, stains, or was too worn.
2. Under garments.
3. Would be a horrible act upon another human being to allow them to wear the evil garment.

What to do With The Clothes to Give Away:
1. Donate to a thrift store or goodwill.
2. Donate to a church to give to a family in need.
3. Hold a garage/yard sale.
4. Give to a homeless shelter.
5. Make sure they are folded, clean, and not overly wrinkled before placing them into someone else's hands.

Honestly, that really big move for us was a big wake up call for me. I realized how overwhelmingly materialistic I was. Sure, I didn't have anything expensive except for my pearls and my engagement ring, but I did have a lot of 'stuff' that I held onto very tightly for not a single good reason. I would find myself crying over having to make decisions to part with my stuff, stuff that didn't have any value, stuff that was just stuff that would wear out and burn up one day. That move gave me the knock on my head and on my heart that I needed to realize what was really important in life, and that no amount of clothes or furniture, or nice dishes, or cute tables or picture frames could ever be of more value than family, friends, others and serving God. 

The Ultimate Brownie...and Many More.

These brownies were my recipe cut in half baked in an 8x8 dish. I used 1 egg plus another's egg whites.

The ultimate girl dessert, brownies. I love brownies, in fact I only know of one person I have ever met that does NOT like brownies...and that person will still eat them if they are laced with chocolate icing. Below I have my own recipe for you that has put many smiles on hungry faces.

Berdy's Brownies

Ingredients:
2 cups sugar
1 cup butter -then melt (if you melt it in the microwave then put the heat setting on low.)
1/2 cup cocoa powder
bit of vanilla extract
1-4 eggs (the less eggs you use the more fudgy they are. 4 eggs are cake-like so I prefer the 1 or 2 )
1 cup flour
few shakes of some salt

Instructions:
*Place ingredients in large bowl in exact order of the ingredients list.
*Using a fork, mix well.
*Bake at 350 degree F. for 20-30 minutes.
*Lick the bowl clean.

After mixing in rest of the ingredients.

1. Sugar then melted butter.

Then cocoa, vanilla, egg.

Snickerdoodle Brownies
-every time I made these they were a HUGE hit. The only difference is that I used real butter instead of margarine. I sold out of them in an hour at my yard-sale last year, the same people kept coming back to buy more.
Chocolate Caramel Brownies

Slutty Brownies -That's just what they're called...I didn't choose the name.

What other brownies do you love?

Modesty Part 2: Shopping Modestly in a Non-Modest World.

Another great chick-flick. 

I recently hosted a 'modesty night' to a group of young women that asked me to help them with this topic. One of them asked a question that reminded me of how I used to wonder the very same thing, "How are we supposed to find modest clothing, that we like, when out shopping? It seems that all I find is immodest apparel that I would never wear." I remember as a teen and young college girl believing this very same thing, that trendy, likable, modest clothing was incapable to be found when shopping in regular stores found at the mall and other places. Finally it hit me around age 20 or 21, it is VERY possible and quite easy and simple to shop modestly.

How? You need to gradually train your mind to know what to look for and how to put together an outfit with a little help from your imagination...

Step 1. Tunnel Vision: Have you ever noticed that when you are interested in a specific something, say a type of car, that suddenly you see that kind of car everywhere? When we focus our mind on a particular 'item' we form what I call "tunnel vision", where our eyes/mind block out everything else around the item allowing us to quickly see, find, and focus on that one thing. Like when we are driving through a tunnel, all we see is what is right in front of us, everything else is darkened and impairs our visual picture except what we are to focus on. So, when shopping put on your tunnel vision and seek out only those obvious modest pieces. Don't allow any of the other things you see to get in the way, if you notice something ridiculous, quickly bounce your eyes off of it and focus them back into what you are looking for.

Over a short amount of time it will start to come naturally to you to find these items and it won't be so tough to seek them out. Then you can move on to...

Step 2: Train your brain to visualize an outfit. Seek out an item of clothing that alone is what you would consider immodest and focus on it. Then try to imagine what can be done to make it into a modest outfit.

Examples:

This dress is cute, but immodest. All you need to do is place a camisole or snap-to-your-bra cloth of some kind (maybe a white or light brown color) underneath to bring the neck-line higher. Then visualize it with a jean jacket.

It may push the length limits on some, if that's the case then simply wear skinny jeans or leggings underneath. Personally, I think a white or cream pair of skinny jeans would be perfect.

This is extremely immodest. But, it can be used as something under a v-neck of some kind, OR you can wear it with a high wasted skirt and a belt to cover any skin that may be between the top and skirt. Then finish it off with a jacket OR put a cardigan on and then the belt over it. Can you imagine the outfit I've designed? This crop top is then turned into a kind of 'undershirt/camisole', like how we would wear a dickie.

These skirts are too short to be worn on their own. But the right color of leggings or skinny jeans can make a really cute outfit.

I love long sweaters, especially when they are worn like this. This lady did the whole thing right. She kept it simple, not too gaudy or too much going on, and the colors flow well together.

There are such things as immodest skinny jeans and leggings even when worn under something. Make sure that you can grab and pinch fabric from your legs when wearing them, if you can't then they are too tight.

I love lace. But it can definitely push the limits of modesty sometimes. This gorgeous lace tunic would look beautiful with a light brown or cream color long sleeved shirt, turtleneck, or camisole underneath it...not nude, black or white (white would take away from seeing the lace).

Lace can look very sexual, something we don't want to be unless in the bedroom with our husband, so make sure that your lace is layered over something in a very classy and soft fashion.

This woman's lace was done right and looks so classy and attraction on her. All she needs is a string of lovely pearls.







*If you need help with visualizing an outfit and having some 'imagination', then just ask another girlfriend to go and help you. 
*Try things on. There have been many of times that I looked at something and thought it was dog-ugly, but then I would give in to my curiosity and try it on and it would end up looking so dern cute and my mind about it changed. So go out of your box and try something different on.


Step 3: Combine your new shopping mind with your wisely chosen budget and you are set.

Mixing Style with Modestly/Rules of the Game.
How to Have a Guilt-Free Shopping Spree

If we allow ourselves to get overwhelmed by all the clutter when shopping and we don't give ourselves a little 'imagination' then yes, it would be difficult to find a modest and cute outfit. But with some tunnel vision, some imagination, and a good budget then it is very possible to walk into your door feeling successful after an afternoon of shopping. Go out of your box.

The Lazy Girl's Guide to 'Cleaning House'.

I hate to clean. Hate it. And well I will admit....I am a lazy bum and I KNOW I am not the only lazy bum out there. So this is for all of you that are like me.

Getting Started:

1. The moment you are in a mood to clean, do it and keep going until you can't anymore. 

-I do my best cleaning in the morning.

2. Find what keeps you energized and motivated, for me it's putting some music on really loud.

3. Have your kids help clean and call it 'character building'...Did I just say that? -Pun intended.

-(Honestly I think it's great to involve your children in helping clean the house because it makes them feel important and part of the family. Plus it preps them for when they are adults.) -No, I'm not a mom. Yes, I think it's okay to have in plan my parenting techniques...and yes, I know it's subject to change once they come.

4. The 'List'. Make a detailed list/chart of things that need to be done every day, every other day, once a week, every other week, monthly, yearly, etc. And check it every day.

5. If you are squished for time and have company coming over soon, then pick the big and important things to clean and skip the little things. Honestly, most people don't notice if your picture frames need dusted.

6. Lower the standard. Stop expecting everyone else's homes to be perfect too. 

We all do it. We all live our daily lives in a home that's not perfect, and then the moment we have guests coming we panic. Maybe if we allowed them to see a non-perfect home, then they won't have to fret so much either...They'd probably feel more comfortable to make themselves 'at home' anyways (which is always my goal).

Below are some very insightful/useful sights I've found for you.

BetterHomes&Gardens -Cleaning Cheats -This was great.

'7 Natural Cleaning Cheats that would rock your world'

The Kitchen:

1. Don't keep a LOT of dishes. Only have in your kitchen the necessary amount for you, your family, and the regular amount of guests. That way you are forced to wash them every day.

2. Lightly squirt your dish soap all over your tile floors and using the sink sprayer, spray the floor. Take a large towel (designated for cleaning) and with your feet on the towel swipe it all over the floor. Lay the towel to dry and toss in laundry. BAM! No extra clean-up necessary.  That's right, I do that.

3. Use your Vinegar Spray to clean the counter tops and cabinets every day after doing dishes.

The Bathroom:

1. I can't remember the last time I lived in a place that didn't have extremely hard water that likes to leave stains. I discovered that if I squirt my toilet cleaner or bleach around the inside of my towel bowl over night right before bed that the long hours of the night will allow the harsh chemicals to eat away anything in there. Then all I need to do in the morning is swish around the toilet brush and flush. I'm done in under one minute.

2. Squeegy your shower walls after every shower to keep the hard water and soap scum from building up.

3. After washing the kitchen floors with the towel, ring it out (if necessary) and -using your feet- wipe it over the bathroom floor.

4. Using toilet paper (or a designated microfiber towel), wipe off the mirror after a steamy shower.

The Living/Family Room:

1. Vacuum hardwood floors (you'll need to adjust the floor setting on it) and THEN swiffer. Sweeping is completely unnecessary when you own a vacuum. BUT, if you prefer to sweep instead then get rid of your pile at the end with your vacuum instead of getting annoyed with trying to sweep it into the dust pan.

2. Dust using only a lightly dampened cloth. -No need for a dusting spray full of irritating chemicals.

3. Don't have too much stuff/clutter. Keeping your 'stuff' to a minimum keeps more space in your home, gives less to clean, is inexpensive, gives a 'cleaner appearance' and less work when moving. So every time you move, or just once a year, make a list of what you are unwilling to get rid of and what you are okay parting with and then give it away or sell it.

Less stuff = less clutter.

What have you found to be helpful in your cleaning routines?

This is for you. It was too funny to pass up.

Snickerdoodle Cookies

This recipe is not my own. Sometime in October or November I realized that I needed another cookie to bake instead of only and always making my beloved No-Bake Cookies. I knew my husband was the chocolate chip cookie baker between us, so that was a no-go, and then I remembered the forever under-rated snickerdoodle cookie. Yup! That was it. So I did some research and found this amazing recipe. I've baked them about 3 times, each time the batch made A LOT of them and the natives here seemed to respond to them much better than any other things I've ever made for them... I had men and women asking me for the recipe which in my opinion is the biggest food compliment you can give someone. So now I must share it with you...

Click HERE for the Snickerdoodle recipe. I feel too guilty to just write out the recipe on here as if it were my own, I would rather take you to the person -or site- I got it from. But, the recipe is too good for me to just keep to myself, thus why I am writing about it on my blog for you.

The only thing that was different for me was that mine baked a lot longer because my oven is weird like that and even though I followed all the measurements it made more like 3 and a half dozen cookies instead of the 2 dozen the blog says (it may turn out differently for you though). I also covered my cookies with way more cinnamon and sugar as you see in my picture of them above.

Enjoy!

P.S. I plan to share my 'brownies from scratch recipe' with you soon and 'how to know when to part with your clothes' topic...what are your thoughts on that? Thanks!